What’s up, y’all? I’m sure most of you know that the new season of Outlander premiered a week ago (Sun. Nov. 4, 2018)! As most of my loyal readers already know, I didn’t do a lot of writing on my blog last year, so there were no Outlander reviews and recaps of each individual episode for season 3. With that being said, I’ve decided to recap what happened last season, before I start reviewing season 4. Let’s get this party started!
The Suck Years
Claire: 1948 – 1968
Let’s begin with the 20 years that Claire and Jaime spent apart, or as I like to call them, “The Suck Years.” So, when Claire goes back to her time, it’s 1948, and it’s been three years since she went through the stones. As we learned from season two, Frank took Claire back, although she married another man back in the 18th century and returned pregnant with his child. They migrate to the States and spend the next 20 years together. And man, what a miserable 20 years it is. No matter how hard Claire tries to make it work with Frank, her heart still belongs to Jamie, and no matter how hard Frank tries to rekindle what he had with Claire, it’s evident that Jamie will continue to haunt their relationship. The only saving grace is that Frank loves Brianna unconditionally.
I have to say though, Frank becomes a bit of an asshole over time. Yeah, he’s been through a lot—I’ll give him that much—but after a while, he decides that he and Claire should have an open relationship, and he starts messin’ around with some chick he works with. After the side piece makes a visit to the house—while guests are there celebrating Claire’s med school graduation—Claire decides that she and Frank should throw in the towel. Frank refuses, saying that if they divorce, Claire would take Brianna away from him. Even though Claire assures him she would never do that, he doesn’t believe her. Fast forward a few years later to Brianna’s high school graduation, Frank is the one who announces he wants a divorce so he can marry his side piece, and even goes so far as to say that when they break up, he’s taking Brianna with him to the UK. Dick move. Sadly, Frank dies in a car accident that same night, and the side piece has the audacity to get in Claire’s face some time later and call her selfish for holding on to a man that she didn’t love. Have a seat, girl (preferably with your legs closed).
To add insult to injury, we all witness Claire being respected (albeit extremely hard earned) by her male peers in the 18th century, but as soon as she returns to the 1940’s, she has to endure damn near non-stop sexism and chauvinists/racists (Claire’s colleague/best friend, Dr. Joe Abernathy, is a black man, and one of Claire’s med school professors made it clear he didn’t want either of them in his class). Whenever she voices her opinion about serious subjects around Frank’s co-workers and superiors, she’s either be written off as being cute or talking way too much. Her decision to become a doctor is met with snide remarks and disdain, too. I couldn’t help but notice that during this era the colors used for the cinematography seemed to be monotone and dull, as if Claire was trapped in a completely depressing and monotonous environment. I didn’t call them the suck years for nothing.
Jamie: 1748 – 1768
Claire wasn’t the only person that had to put up with constant misery for the next two decades. Jamie’s 20 years away from his beloved were just as bad, if not worse. I take that back; they were worse. Hell, at least Claire had TV and indoor plumbing. After Claire travels through the stones, Jaime goes back to the Battle of Culloden to accept his fate. Thankfully, he doesn’t die…but that damn Black Jack Randall did! Kick rocks, bitch! As we already knew, the Scottish don’t win the overall war, and it’s not long before the English catch up to the wounded men that made it out of the battlefield and execute them all, including Rupert. Young John Grey’s brother realizes that Jamie is among the men, and instead of executing him, he keeps his brother’s word to leave Jamie unharmed and makes arrangements to take him back to Lallybroch.
Four to six years later, Jamie is laying low in a cave not too far from the Lallybroch estate. By this time, Jenny has enough kids to start her own basketball team—including teenaged Fergus, Robbie McNabb and baby Ian on the way—and the Brits are harassing her and Ian Sr. damn near every day looking for Jamie (who’s now known as “The Dunbonnet”). In one instance, one of the redcoats follows Fergus into the woods thinking he’ll lead him to Jamie, but Fergus leads the fool on a bit of a wild goose chase. When Fergus teases him for his stupidity, the nasty ass soldier cuts the young boy’s hand off. Fergus being maimed is the last straw for Jamie. He convinces Jenny to turn him into the authorities so the family can have some peace, and off to prison The Dunbonnet goes.
When Jamie’s in prison, he crosses paths with Lord John Grey himself, who’s now all grown up and handed the title of prison warden. Jamie also reunites with Murtaugh (yay!). While inside, Jamie is known as “MacDubh” (pronounced “McDoo”) and does his best to look after the other inmates. Jamie and John develop a special bond (for John, it’s unrequited love), and when the inmates are later transferred, John sees to it that Jamie is made a butler for a well-to-do English family, The Dunsanys. Lord John also makes sure to keep Jamie’s real identity as a Jacobite secret. While Jamie is working for the Dunsanys, their spoiled rotten daughter, Geneva, sets her sights on him. She’s betrothed to an old ugly man that she can’t stand, and she makes up her mind to lose her virginity to a sexy Scot, and of course, Jamie is a perfect choice. Jamie initially refuses, but Geneva blackmails him into sleeping with her by threatening to tell her parents that he’s really a Jacobite. Jamie gives in and does the deed with her, and lo and behold, Geneva ends up pregnant. Boo…
Sadly, Geneva dies after giving birth to baby William, but Jamie looks after Willie for the next few years. However, more and more people begin to notice the resemblance between Willie and Jamie, and learning the boy’s true parentage was not an option. Lord John, who’s married Geneva’s sister Isabela by this time, agree to take Willie in and raise him as their own. Jamie leaves Willie behind, his heart destroyed for the second time. Sometimes I wonder why I love this show. By the way, I just realized that Jamie’s two-decade separation was a lot shittier than Claire’s. Poor baby.
Happy Days Are Here Again…Sort Of
Now that we’ve gotten past the unpleasant 20 years that Jamie and Claire spent apart (Jamie especially), let’s go on to the hot couple getting back together! Roger Wakefield, Brianna’s love interest and the son of the late Reverend Wakefield, does some research and learns of Jamie’s whereabouts 20 years after Claire walked through the stones. It turns out he was running a printing press in Edinburgh under the name Alexander Malcolm (look, I know that this last alias was made up of Jamie’s actual middle names, but let’s be honest…the man’s had more name changes than P. Diddy). Claire feels some type of resentment that Roger told her where to find Jamie…at first. Then she comes to her senses and decides to go get her man back. She stitches up an 18th century dress complete with pockets and whatnot, buys some Loving Care to dye her grey streaks brown (was anyone else confused as to why Claire looked older in the 20th century than she does in the 18th century when she went back? It ain’t the dye job), tells her baby girl goodbye and takes a little trip to Scotland. And what does Jamie do when he sees Claire again? He drops like a sack of potatoes.
Needless to say, Claire and Jamie spend the day together trying to get to know each other again, and later that night, they go back to Jamie’s place (a whorehouse) and make luuurrrve. I have to say, Claire and Jamie’s “I missed you” sex scene almost rivaled the wedding night scene. Almost. However, the honeymoon is short lived. Claire kills some idiot that broke into the Fraser’s room trying to learn where Jamie hides his illegal liquor for his smuggling business, causing her and Jamie to bicker damn near the entire morning after (Claire tried to save the fool, but Jamie figured he should just go on to glory since he tried to rape Claire, causing a neverending argument). Another idiot—working for the same fool that sent the first idiot—breaks into Jamie’s print shop to see if he can learn where the casks of liquor are stored, but comes across Jamie’s seditious pamphlets instead. He grabs them and burns Jamie’s print shop, with 16-year-old Ian Jr. still inside (and the boy was getting his freak on while all this was happening).
Thankfully Ian is unharmed, but when Claire and Jamie take him back home to Lallybroch, Jenny isn’t too psyched to see Claire again. Jenny even goes out of her way to let Claire know that Jamie’s married to someone else by sending word to his wife and stepchildren to stop by the house. If that’s not bad enough, Jamie’s wife is none other than slack ass Laoghaire (who became crazier and a lot less attractive in 20 years)! When Laoghaire learns that Jamie still loves Claire and always will, she shoots him—in all honesty, she was trying to shoot Claire, but missed—and demands a divorce, as well as alimony to boot! Jamie remembers finding a lost treasure on a remote island from back in his prison days, and he decides to use it to pay Laoghaire’s crazy ass. However, when young Ian swims out to the island to retrieve it, he’s kidnapped by pirates and taken to Jamaica. Claire and Jamie waste no time going after him.
Jamaican Me Crazy
It turns out that the pirates that snatched up Ian work for none other than Ms. Gellis Duncan herself, and if she wasn’t a witch before, she damn sure is one now. I mean, this chick bathes in blood, consults with mediums, holds esoteric rituals, kidnaps and rapes young boys (Ian included) before sacrificing them, the whole nine. Claire and Jamie take two of Jamie’s prison inmates, Mr. Willoughby (a Chinese gentleman that Jamie befriended a few years back), and Fergus (who’s now completely grown up) to help them get Ian back. Fergus drops a bomb on Claire and Jamie: he’s marrying Marsali, Laoghaire’s daughter. In case you were wondering, yes, Marsali is almost as annoying as Laoghaire. Her favorite name for Claire was “hoor” (whore), never mind the fact that Jamie was Claire’s man first, and they never were officially divorced. Too bad Ms. Marsali never learned that her mother is a murderous ho herself.
Anyway, after a rough ass trip over the seven seas (one that includes a deadly epidemic, a conspiracy, Jamie and Claire being separated again thanks to the British, a storm that takes out half the crew, a slightly disturbed doctor on a nearby island and Fergus and Marsali’s wedding), the gang finally make it to Jamaica. Before y’all start having visions of sunny beaches, bright skies, the sound of reggae music and weed crops as far as the eye can see, please keep in mind that this ain’t the same Jamaica we see on TV nowadays, and Claire soon learns that. 1700’s Jamaica is full of colonialism and slavery. Claire finds herself sickened by the slave auctions and begs Jamie to help one poor soul that’s being molested while he’s put on display (I’m not making this up). Jamie buys the man and intends to free him after he helps them try to find Ian. Some viewers accused Claire and Jamie of being white saviors using a slave for their own selfish purposes, but that subject is for another blog post.
Long story short, Claire and Gellis later reunite at the governor’s party on the island, we learn that the new governor is Lord John Grey (who still has a crush on Jamie and manages to pardon Jamie for all his crimes in Scotland), and they later learn that Gellis has been holding Ian this entire time. Just to backtrack a bit, do you remember when I said that Gellis was consulting with mediums? She hired a woman named Margaret and her unscrupulous brother to tell her exactly how Scotland can free itself from English rule (Claire treated Margaret while she was in Edinburgh, ironically enough). Margaret basically told Gellis that a 200-year-old baby would have to be sacrificed. After Claire tells Gellis that she returned to the future pregnant with Jamie’s child, it doesn’t take long for Gellis to figure out that the 200-year-old baby is Brianna. Gellis is all gung-ho to go back to the future and take out Brianna like The Terminator’s mama (there’s a Jamaican version of Craigh Na Dun in a nearby cave). But what role does Ian play in all this? He’s the human sacrifice Gellis needs to go back to the ’60s. I really wish someone would tell this chick that people don’t have to get killed for the time travel stones to work. Jamie and Claire find Gellis just in time and save Ian and Brianna by damn near cutting Gellis’s head off. Jamie frees the young slave he bought (and I’m sure he went on to sire Bob Marley’s people…just joking), and Mr. Willoughby decides to stay in Jamaica, as he’s fallen in love with Margaret. Oh yeah, and Margaret’s no good brother is killed, but no one cares.
If that ain’t enough, on the way back to Scotland, the ship encounters yet another storm, and this time Claire is thrown from the ship. Thankfully, Jamie saves her and they’re washed up on the shores of Virginia! Whoo! Ms. Claire, if you thought Jamaica was a trip, you ain’t seen nothin’ yet!
Whew! That was basically everything that happened in Outlander last season, so now you’re caught up to speed! I’ll have a mini recap of episode 1 and a full recap of episode 2 from the new season up real soon!
—Written by Nadiya
What did you think of Outlander’s third season? Was it bonny or was it a load of bollocks (if you’re from the UK and/or watch the show, you know what I just said)? Let me know in the comments section!