Hey, y’all! I know y’all think I forgot about you, but I promise I didn’t. The truth of the matter is that thanks to this crazy weather we’ve been having, my sinuses have been kicking my natural black ass, and between that and some other issues (you ladies know about those), I’ve been too tired and doped up on Benadryl and/or pain meds to give y’all the recaps and reviews I promised a few weeks ago. Also, I had to take my mother to Charlotte, NC two weeks ago, so there’s that. By the way, if you’re thinking about investing in an IPhone, you may want to reconsider that choice after viewing the picture below.
This is what you’ll have to deal with when your IPhone/IPad malfunctions, and trust me, it will malfunction. Just sayin’. At least the people working there were sweet.
Anyway, like I said, I already promised you guys that I’d write a review for the “Providence” episode of Outlander, and I’m not the type of person to back out of my promises. However, in order to save some time and get to the nitty gritty (the finale), I’m just going to point my favorite and least favorite aspects of the episode. Y’all ready to get this party started or what?
The Cool Stuff
Brianna Admits One of Her Many Bratty Ways
Brianna decides that forgiveness is the best way to get over what happened to her, and to do that, she plans on going to Wilmington to visit Bonnet in jail. Lord John is against this, so to convince him, Brianna reads Jamie’s letter to her, explaining that vengeance is not the answer. After she finishes, she remarks that when Jamie left, she never told him goodbye. Well, duh! I’m just glad this brat actually acknowledges some of her bad behavior. I would say that maybe she’ll stop making the same mistakes when it comes to her loved ones and act like somebody towards her father, but like I said in the last review, I’m not expecting miracles from this chick.
Murtagh Gets Busted Out of Jail
After Murtagh gets busted along with ratchet ass Stephen Bonnet (which irks me…Murtagh is guilty of protesting ridiculous taxes, Bonnet is a murderer/rapist. Where’s the doggone justice?), Fergus vows to help him escape the noose (that’s right, the dang noose), and Marsali—who’s ride or die—agrees to help him. She even said that if Fergus hadn’t suggested it, she would have (can we trade Brianna for Marsali?). They also agree that they should take Jamie up on his offer and move to Fraser’s Ridge. Sometime later, Marsali parks the getaway wagon (which also doubles as a moving van) a few feet from the jailhouse, while Fergus meets with Murtagh’s men. After they bum rush the guards, they grab Murtagh out of the jail and escape, but not before blowing the doggone place up.
Brianna Visits No Good Bonnet
As previously mentioned, after Brianna reads Jamie letter explaining that forgiveness is the best route to take for her to move on with her life, she decides to visit Bonnet before his execution. Lord John takes Brianna to Wilmington a few days later to see him. Of course, Bonnet acts like a complete asshole (he didn’t even recognize Brianna at first. I guess he’s violated that many women in his lifetime) until Brianna tells him his alleged unborn child will never know anything about him. For the first time in his evil life, Bonnet does something selfless and gives Brianna a ruby to help feed the baby. By the way, all this goes down when—you guessed it—Murtagh’s being broken out of jail. Murtagh notices Brianna there and has some pretty harsh words for Lord John. Despite Lord John and Murtagh’s disdain for one another, when the authorities question Brianna and her “betrothed” about what they saw at the jail, Lord John says that he didn’t notice anything strange. Love that guy. Speaking of which…
Lord John Proves Once Again That He’s the Man
When Brianna arrives at Wilmington, she’s visibly nervous and tells Lord John that she misses her mother (not her dad, of course). Lord John tells her that both Brianna’s parents are doing their best to bring Roger back and to return to her. Brianna tells Lord John that he’s impossible not to like. Yes, we know. I remember when everyone wigged out when they learned Lord John was being introduced to the cast and I wondered what all the fuss was about. Now I know.
Jamie and Claire Make a Cameo on Their Own Damn Show
Good news is, we get to see Jamie and Claire in this episode. The bad news is, we see them for less than two minutes, and they’re not even speaking (technically). While Brianna is reading Jamie’s letter, we hear him giving the audience a voice over of the note’s contents, as we watch him, Claire and Ian trek across the wilderness, making their way to Roger. Booooo!
Brianna Tells No Good Bonnet About the Baby
I hated that Brianna told that evil ass Bonnet that she was pregnant. Now, I know what y’all are thinking, “Every man has the right to know about his child.” First off, the baby may not be Bonnet’s (I’m hoping that’s the case), secondly, Bonnet is a horrible human being that has absolutely no morals or values. Telling someone like him that he has a child in the world would probably only stroke his ego and cause him to do something horrendous…like kidnap the baby and raise it himself, which would help create another maladjusted human being. Y’all are probably also thinking: “Isn’t Bonnet about to be hanged, and wasn’t Bonnet still in the jailhouse when it exploded? Either way, he’s dead!” That brings me to my next point…
Bonnet’s Nefarious Ass Probably Escaped
When Fergus and the other men freed Murtagh from his cell, the keys fell out of the lock and dropped…right in front of Bonnet’s open cell (Lord…). Murtagh’s people made sure to get an unconscious guard out of the building before the explosion went off…but only the guard. They left Bonnet’s evil ass right there. However, it appears that Bonnet was able to stretch his foot his out to reach the keys right before the jailhouse blew up. Did he get out before the explosion or did he perish? I guess we’ll find out next season. That’s right, we didn’t get an update during the season finale.
Roger Considers Looking Out for #1 and Euthanizes a Poor Man
I didn’t forget about Roger, y’all! During Roger’s time in the Mohawk camp, he’s made a slave that’s basically named “Dogface” (no BS) due to him failing the test of going through the Soul Train Line from Hell. Dogface isn’t in the best shape thanks to being beat like a man that owed someone money, so the chief has him stay in a hut with another prisoner. The other poor soul is a priest that fell in love with one of the Mohawk women named Johiehon, who’s one of the few nice people in the tribe, to be honest. The priest tells Roger that when he came there to missionary to the Mohawk, they welcomed him with open arms, but after he broke his vows and refused to baptize the child he fathered with Johiehon as a result, he immediately ended up on their shit list. Roger tells the priest to go ahead and baptize the baby, given that the Mohawk know very little when it comes to the rules regarding the Catholic Church. The priest refuses, saying that even if they don’t know, he’d know, and he couldn’t live with taking his vows to God so lightly. The Mohawk give the priest another chance to baptist the baby, but he still refuses. This time, the tribesmen pull a Mr. Blonde and cut the man’s ear off. On top of that, they sentence the priest to die by literally holding his feet to a fire. Even though only his feet will be burned, he’ll die a slow and painful death either by shock or infection.
Roger deems the priest a moron and regales his sad tale of crossing an ocean (he left out the time travel part) to be with the woman he loves, just to get his ass beaten to a bloody pulp by her dad (yep, he pieced together that Jamie is Brianna’s dad!). Roger goes on to tell him that he stumbled across a way to get back home, but he purposefully didn’t take it because of love, and that the priest needs to take on Roger’s newfound philosophy: invest in self-preservation and bump everyone else. Turn your back on love. I have to be honest, it hurt to see Roger talk that way, but after all he’s been through, I can definitely understand why. The priest and Roger try to dig their way out of the hut after the “look out for #1 speech,” but when daylight comes and they see they’ve only made a hole that’s hardly big enough for my 6 lb. cat to squeeze through, the priest decides to accept his fate.
The tribesmen drag the priest off and Roger escapes before the execution gets underway. However, Roger’s “the hell with everyone else” mantra soon dies once he hears the priest’s screams of agony. Roger rushes back to the camp and throws a barrel of alcohol on the fire, setting the priest completely ablaze and putting him out of his misery. Sadly enough, Johiehon is so distraught over the loss of her man that she gives her baby boy a kiss goodbye and joins the priest in the fire. 😭😭
—Written by Nadiya
I know it’s been a while, but what were you favorite and least favorite things about “Providence”? Let me know in the comments section!